Monday 14 March 2011

Can you work with your spouse?

A common question I get asked these days goes something like this: How do you manage to work with Rob (my husband) all the time? Or if the person asking is being a bit less subtle: How can you possibly work with your spouse?

Rob and I both work for the children's charity Viva, with me devoting 90% of my time, and Rob 50%. The other 50% Rob works on his writing and speaking business, which I help on from time to time. Viva does not have an office yet, so we work mostly from our home, with half of the week spent on meetings on HK Island.

We are both National Directors in Hong Kong, and have different skills and backgrounds. I'm an ex lawyer, with a few years of experience in the development sector, whilst Rob used to be a high school teacher, and has in recent years become a professional adventurer, writer and motivational speaker.

I'm naturally risk averse, conservative (or pessimistic in Rob's eyes) and I tend to over plan. Rob, on the other hand, likes to take risks, is highly optimistic (or slightly reckless in my books) and does not like planning much at all.

And we are both quite opinionated.

So you can imagine our meetings can get heated sometimes! (As my younger sister who's stayed with us can testify to...)

It's a real challenge, but we've found the following tips useful (not saying they're easy to follow...)

Try not to speak in your own natural work language
Don't assume that your way of working is always right
Leave plenty of time for discussion of potentially explosive topics e.g. finances
Sort out your own issues
Play to each other's strength i.e. actively affirm each other's contribution
Forgive each other - no one is perfect

Incidentally, we think these are also the same tips for helping with our marriage!

Do you work with your spouse? Do you have any tips which you can share?


1 comment:

Jean said...

I have a full-time job but do work for my partner. He has a cycling infrastructure consulting firm and I'm a part-time blogmaster @ http://thirdwavecyclingblog.wordpress.com

Also @ http://www.velo-city2012blog.com He resigned recently (for various reasons, even though he was the lead steering this entire conference).

As you can see we do blog articles and use each other's photos. :)

Someone said to me that she thought it was romantic we had blogs where we each wrote blog articles. There's no pattern. Whatever topic whichever person knows best/is passionate.

He is actually quite organized and I am also but in a different more messier way. (I would like to think more creative. Hah.)

I'm sure you and your hubby will do well with Viva. Best of luck.